I’m enjoying a night on the town. No thanks to those squiggly eels, I’ve got my own slippery style. Of course, everybody is famous now, although you can barely tell one from the other, so it’s pretty much unanimous. Suffering loves company, especially if you’re sick and tired of the same old same old. But look who’s talking.
Tuesday, my cousin Billy, that snake, swallowed himself. As a brand ambassador, it was the least he could do. Fortunately, there’ll be no more counting backward in alphabetical order for Lonesome Billy. In fact, he quit the whole vegan thing and prefers plastic flowers to hydroponic gardening, at least until he gets back on his feet.
It’s impossible to know where you are without being somewhere in time. The First World War wasn’t the First World War, until the Second World War. The future mutilates the past, which is why I can’t tell if I’m taking the pre-test or the post-test? I guess it depends on my net worth.
Whenever I’m away from home, I like to practice my evasive driving skills. It doesn’t matter who you run into; it only matters who runs into you. Of course, wherever you are, you must pay attention to the magnetic waves. Remember: at the South Pole, every direction is north. No matter how hard they try, they’ll never take that away from you.
Appears in Nixes Mate Review, Spring/Summer 2024