Decluttering my personal pronouns. If I had my way, I’d hammer the water back into the pipes, too, but that would be an uphill battle. Fortunately, I’m sworn to secrecy, so I sleep on knives to avoid any possibility of a stabbing. I use a hotel pillow because in the back of my head there’s a diamond that absorbs all the invisible light. It’s beautiful, like heaven or an ant colony. The down side is, when I get up in the morning, I’m lightning-prone, so I have to shift my weight from north to south, but at least it gives me an opportunity to practice my lying skills. Have you noticed that you have to get really good at lying to yourself in order to get better at lying to others? Of course, that’s the price you pay for participating in a simulated emergency. I hope the fire station across the street doesn’t burn down. With this 40-day deluge, that would be a miracle, although, under all this water, I won’t hold my breath.
Appears in Momentary Turbulence from Cervena Barva Press